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Is it normal to fall in love with your best friend's same gender?

Published in Attraction and Identity 2 mins read

Yes, it is normal to fall in love with someone of the same gender as your best friend. Attraction is complex and doesn't always adhere to preconceived notions.

Understanding Attraction and Normality

Attraction can be a confusing experience, especially when it deviates from what you expect or what society often portrays as the "norm." When this attraction involves a close friend and is towards the same gender, it can feel particularly disorienting. However, it's important to recognize that:

  • Attraction is Fluid: Human attraction isn't always fixed. People's feelings can evolve and change over time.
  • Exploring Curiosity is Healthy: Experiencing attraction outside of your typical "type" is normal, according to McDaniel, and something you should feel free to explore with curiosity.
  • It's Common to Feel Confused: According to McDaniel, it's common to feel confused by same-gender attraction, especially if you first experience it with a friend.

Therefore, experiencing romantic feelings towards someone of the same gender as your best friend doesn't make you unusual or wrong. It simply means you're experiencing a valid human emotion.

Dealing with the Situation

If you're struggling with these feelings, here are some points to consider:

  • Self-Reflection: Take time to understand your feelings and why you might be attracted to this person.
  • Communication: Decide if and how you want to communicate your feelings, considering the potential impact on your friendship.
  • Acceptance: Accept your feelings as valid, regardless of whether or not they are reciprocated.
  • Professional Help: If you are having difficulty processing your feelings, consider talking to a therapist or counselor who can provide support and guidance.