Why Do Jews Cover Mirrors at a Wake?

Jews cover mirrors at a wake, specifically during the seven-day mourning period known as Shiva, primarily to shift the focus from personal appearance to the profound act of mourning and spiritual introspection. This practice is part of a broader set of customs designed to help mourners fully engage with their grief and honor the deceased.

Understanding Shiva: The Core Mourning Period

Shiva, meaning "seven" in Hebrew, is an intensive initial period of mourning observed immediately following the burial of a close relative (parent, spouse, child, or sibling). During this time, mourners traditionally remain at home, refrain from work, and receive comforting visits from friends and family. The customs observed during Shiva are intended to provide structure for grief and encourage deep reflection.

Key Reasons for Covering Mirrors

The practice of covering mirrors during Shiva serves multiple significant purposes rooted in Jewish tradition and psychology:

1. Focus on Mourning, Not Appearance

One of the central reasons for covering mirrors is to discourage attention to personal vanity and outward appearance. During Shiva, mourners often neglect personal grooming, refraining from activities like haircuts, shaving, applying makeup, or wearing new clothes. Covering mirrors reinforces this detachment from superficial concerns, reminding mourners that their focus should be solely on their grief and the memory of the deceased. It emphasizes that this is a time for inner reflection, not external presentation.

2. Spiritual Reflection and Humility

Removing mirrors encourages a shift from the physical self to the spiritual realm. In times of profound loss, Jewish tradition emphasizes turning inward, confronting one's mortality, and reflecting on life's deeper meanings. The absence of mirrors promotes a sense of humility and helps mourners concentrate on the soul of the deceased and their own spiritual journey without the distraction of self-image.

3. Avoiding Distraction During Prayer

Jewish law prohibits praying in front of a mirror, as it could be seen as bowing to one's own reflection or a form of idolatry, or simply create an unnecessary distraction during a sacred act. Since communal prayers (minyan) are often held in the mourner's home during Shiva, covering mirrors ensures that all participants can pray without this potential impediment or distraction.

4. Detachment from Worldly Pleasures

Shiva is a period of withdrawal from many routine worldly pleasures and activities. Covering mirrors aligns with other customs, such as sitting on low stools, refraining from wearing leather shoes, or avoiding entertainment, all of which underscore the somber nature of the period and the mourner's temporary detachment from mundane concerns.

Practical Implications and Examples

• Creates a Contemplative Environment: The absence of reflective surfaces helps create a somber and contemplative atmosphere conducive to grief and remembrance.
• Encourages Support: By removing personal appearance as a concern, mourners are more likely to accept help and comfort from others, focusing on their emotional needs rather than maintaining a facade.
• Symbolic Act: It serves as a powerful visual symbol of the disruption caused by death, signifying that life is temporarily on hold for the mourner.

To summarize the various reasons for covering mirrors during Shiva:

This practice, while seemingly simple, is a profound element of Jewish mourning rituals, helping individuals navigate the immense pain of loss with a focus on spiritual healing and communal support.

For more information on Jewish mourning practices, you can visit resources like My Jewish Learning's guide to Jewish Burial and Mourning.