According to the poem "On Children," parents should strive to become like their children to align themselves with the future, embrace new possibilities, and foster the unique potential of their offspring, rather than imposing their past experiences or expectations upon them.
Embracing the Future and Individuality
Kahlil Gibran's "On Children" presents a profound perspective on parenthood, emphasizing that children are not possessions but distinct individuals with their own destinies. The poem suggests that parents are merely the vessels through which life propagates itself, with children representing an inherent forward movement.
- Children of Tomorrow: The poem posits that children embody the "tomorrows" and possess their own future, distinct from the parents' "yesterdays." By striving to be like their children, parents are encouraged to embrace this forward-looking perspective, letting go of outdated ideas and fixed notions. It's about moving towards the unknown future with an open mind, much like a child venturing into the world.
- Fostering Unique Potential: Each child possesses their own potential and path of growth. Parents are called to recognize and respect this inherent individuality, allowing children to develop according to their own nature. Striving to be "like them" implies observing, learning from, and aligning with this natural unfolding of potential, rather than attempting to mold them into a preconceived image or relive parental dreams through them.
- Releasing the Burdens of the Past: A crucial aspect of this advice is the warning against projecting one's past onto children. Parents should "never trust our past on them." This means liberating children from the parents' unfulfilled desires, regrets, or past experiences. To "strive to be like them" in this context is to shed the baggage of one's own history and approach life with a fresh, unburdened perspective, similar to the inherent purity and newness of a child.
Practical Implications for Parents
To genuinely embody this philosophy, parents can adopt several approaches:
- Cultivate Open-Mindedness: Be open to new ideas and perspectives, especially those introduced by children, recognizing that they often see the world with a fresh, unbiased view.
- Encourage Independence: Support children in exploring their own interests and making their own choices, fostering their autonomy and self-discovery.
- Listen Actively: Pay genuine attention to children's thoughts, dreams, and feelings, valuing their unique voice and contributions.
- Learn and Adapt: Recognize that parenting is a continuous learning journey. Be willing to learn from children, adapting parenting styles to meet their evolving needs and individuality.
- Avoid Imposing Personal Dreams: Resist the urge to steer children towards paths that mirror the parents' own unfulfilled ambitions or past experiences. Instead, support them in discovering and pursuing their own passions.
Ultimately, by striving to become like their children, parents are encouraged to shed rigidity, embrace change, and recognize that their role is to facilitate growth and guide, rather than to control or dictate, the path of these "living arrows."
