Paradoxical self, specifically paradoxical self-esteem, refers to contrasting levels of self-liking and self-competence. In simpler terms, it's when someone has seemingly conflicting feelings about themselves, such as liking themselves a lot but not feeling very capable, or vice versa.
Understanding Paradoxical Self-Esteem
The core of paradoxical self-esteem lies in the disconnect between how much someone likes themselves (self-liking) and how competent they perceive themselves to be (self-competence). This isn't simply low or high self-esteem; it's a specific combination of these elements that creates the paradox.
Key Components
| Component | Description |
|---|---|
| Self-Liking | How much someone inherently likes or values themselves, regardless of abilities. |
| Self-Competence | How capable or effective someone believes they are in various areas. |
The Paradox
The paradox arises when these two components are misaligned. For example:
- High Self-Liking, Low Self-Competence: Someone might feel inherently worthy and lovable but not believe they are good at anything.
- Low Self-Liking, High Self-Competence: Someone might recognize their abilities and achievements but still not like themselves very much.
Implications and Potential Causes
The referenced text suggests that one reason this form of self-esteem persists is due to heightened selectivity in processing social information. This means individuals with paradoxical self-esteem might be more likely to:
- Pay attention to information that confirms their existing beliefs about themselves (even if those beliefs are contradictory).
- Dismiss or downplay information that challenges their self-perception.
Example: Someone with high self-liking but low self-competence might readily accept compliments on their personality but dismiss praise for their work performance, attributing it to luck or other external factors.
