The best way to revise the sentence "I had to prove my identity to gain entrance to the building, I was required to fill out an impressive number of forms" is to use a semicolon to correctly separate its two independent clauses.
The Best Revision
The most effective and grammatically sound revision of the sentence is:
"I had to prove my identity to gain entrance to the building; I was required to fill out an impressive number of forms."
Understanding the Original Sentence's Error
The original sentence, "I had to prove my identity to gain entrance to the building, I was required to fill out an impressive number of forms," contains a common grammatical mistake known as a comma splice. A comma splice occurs when two independent clauses (which could stand alone as complete sentences) are joined together by only a comma.
In this specific sentence:
- Independent Clause 1: "I had to prove my identity to gain entrance to the building"
- Independent Clause 2: "I was required to fill out an impressive number of forms"
Each of these clauses expresses a complete thought, and simply connecting them with a comma creates a grammatical error, making the sentence technically a run-on.
Why a Semicolon Is the Best Solution
Using a semicolon (;) is the most appropriate and effective way to correct this comma splice and revise the sentence. A semicolon serves to link two closely related independent clauses, indicating that while they are distinct thoughts, they share a strong logical connection. In the revised sentence, both clauses relate directly to the process of entering the building, making the semicolon an ideal choice to show this close relationship.
This method improves clarity and grammatical correctness, ensuring the sentence flows well while maintaining the connection between the two actions.
Alternative Revision Methods
While a semicolon is highly recommended for showing a strong, direct relationship between the clauses, other grammatically correct methods can also be used to revise a comma splice:
- Using a Period to Create Two Separate Sentences: This approach separates the clauses entirely, breaking the flow between them but ensuring grammatical correctness.
- Example: "I had to prove my identity to gain entrance to the building. I was required to fill out an impressive number of forms."
- Using a Comma and a Coordinating Conjunction: This method involves adding a coordinating conjunction (such as and, but, or, so, for, nor, yet) after the comma to connect the clauses. The choice of conjunction depends on the logical relationship between the clauses.
- Example (adding 'and'): "I had to prove my identity to gain entrance to the building, and I was required to fill out an impressive number of forms."
- Example (adding 'so'): "I had to prove my identity to gain entrance to the building, so I was required to fill out an impressive number of forms."
For a deeper understanding of semicolon usage and how to avoid common punctuation errors like comma splices, you can explore reliable resources on punctuation rules and sentence structure.